Category Archives for Relationships

Stop Playing the Blame Game

Every day the universe provides us with evidence that the Law of Attraction really works.  Yet most of us fail to see this.  We want to believe that we can be creators of our own reality and when we think about this, we think in terms of abundance, loving relationships, and all the good stuff.  We think about all the positive things and experiences we wish to manifest.

To truly be in charge of our own destinies, then we must accept that whatever life throws at us, both positive and negative, is down to us.  It is important to remember that the Law of Attraction is working all the time whether we believe in it or not, whether we are consciously focusing on what we want or not.

And here lies the problem.

The universe responds to your dominant vibration on a subject. This vibration is caused by your emotions which are caused by your thoughts.  So when you feel good about something because your thoughts on the subject are positive, you send out a positive vibration, but when your thoughts are negative, you feel terrible and send out a negative vibration to which the universe responds.

Most people go through life at the mercy of whatever life is throwing at them.  If good things happen, they feel good and when the opposite happens, they feel bad.  These vibrations are  in conflict and to keep things simple, they cancel each other out, leaving you pretty much where you are.  You will not progress or be able to manifest what you really want until you can understand this and accept it.

It doesn’t matter how hard you try to believe in something if you are unable to take accountability for the negative manifestations in your life.

When bad things happen we play the blame game.

It’s her fault, it’s his fault.  Sound familiar? 

Then there’s justifications.  I don’t have a good education.  I don’t have the money to do what I need to do.  I was born into this situation.  I was lied to.  I was taken advantage of.  Nobody appreciates me. Nobody understands me.

This always happens to me!

Then there’s excuses.  It’s not my fault.  Life is so unfair. I knew that was going to happen to me.  So if that's what you're feeling do you really expect to experience anything else?

What we are really saying is that we have no control.  We blame others.  We blame circumstances, but we don’t blame ourselves.  It’s often easier to cast ourselves in the role of the victim than to take responsibility, after all we would never have knowingly chosen that experience.  We would never have chosen to have no money or to be treated in that way.  And if it’s not by our choosing, then it’s not our fault and if it’s not our fault, then someone else is to blame.


But we want to believe in the Law of Attraction.  We want to believe we can create life circumstances that fill us with joy.  And when we do, we can say we did that.  We can say that we were able to manifest and that the law of attraction works for us.

So effectively we are choosing what we take responsibility for.  The good stuff is all our doing, but the negative is not our fault.

The law of attraction is working all the time and responding to your vibration.  The universe reflects back to you circumstances, people, events that match your vibration and create the world as you know it.  You will attract people into your life that will be a positive influence or just the opposite.  So when things don’t work out or go well for you, accept that you, and you alone, created those circumstances.

And if you can accept that, then you’re half way there.  You will begin to pay more attention to what you are thinking.  Reflect on your present experiences and try and see the correlation of them and what your thoughts on the subject are, or the person have been.  What have you been sending out to the universe?

So if our circumstances are created by our thoughts why does it feel that the universe responds more to our negative thoughts than our positive ones?  This basically comes down to resistance.


Cambridge and Oxford dictionary explanations:

  • the act of fighting against something that is attacking you, or refusing to accept something
  • a force that acts to stop the progress of something or make it slower
  • the refusal to accept or comply with something

Unfortunately, due to life experience, we have deep beliefs on all sorts of things so when your conscious brain desires something your sub-conscious brain will either be resistant or supportive to the idea.

For example, you want to win the lottery.  Do you really believe it or are you somewhat resistant to the idea?  Do you doubt it?  And what about the thought that something won’t work out for you.  Do you doubt that?  Are you resistant to that idea?  Probably not.

So because our resistance to certain things is lower or non-existent, we are easily able to manifest them. 

And this is good news.  If you’re being honest with yourself you will see how you created the negative or unwanted situations in your life.  This is exciting. You can do something about it. You can stop blaming others or life in general.

And when you stop playing the blame game, you will think different thoughts.  And when you think different thoughts, you will feel differently and when you feel differently, you will vibrate differently.

You will be different.  You will accept you only have yourself to blame and your life will be different!